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Bourne Conspiracy: First Impressions

Monday 19 May 2008


It's been a good week for new demo releases, with Dragonball Z, Grid, and now this releasing onto the marketplace.

I've been anticipating this game for a while, and so I'm pretty pleased they've released it, just so as i can kick seven shades of shit out of some goons.

The title screen and accompanying music is very "Modern Spy Thriller" so I guess at least it looks the part, there's 3 levels on the demo, and I start with "Escape the Embassy" on the respectable "Agent" difficulty. I'm blasted with two loading screens with an insane amount of commands, and suddenly I'm balls deep in combat with three embassy guards. The fighting at this stage feels a little confusing, but I struggled through it and shown "Bourne instinct" now, I don't mean to be cynical here, but how many fucking games recently have had an "instinct" that shows useful objects as outlined when you activate it?

Then there's quick time events. ugh, so far this game was playing like a handbook of Game Cliche's and I'm struggling to get into it. By the time I reached the first boss, I was starting to lose hope, but the boss was a lot of fun, the fist fight in the office, frantically blocking, it was pretty good. Maybe there was light at the end of the tunnel after all.

It feels like your merely experiencing the game, rather then actually playing it, and the further I got into the first level of this demo, the more that feeling was reinforced. Trying to take on two baton wielding opponents at once was a nightmare as for some ungodly reason Bourne was far too hardcore to y'know, pick up a baton and use it against the second guard, oh no. so I escaped the embassy, and the first level was over. I was informed I had achieved a time of 14 minutes and 31 seconds. I wasn't exactly ready to shout from the rooftops about the game, to say the least.

The second level started far better giving me a firearm. The shooting felt a little slow, but it was still responsive, and I'm a big fan of destructible environments in my shoot outs, so that was another tick in the box. In the second level, I found the fights to be so ridiculously difficult that they just weren't fun anymore, every enemy I fought seemed to be some bizarre combination of Chuck Norris and Steven Segal, so I kept my distance. The last boss of the second level was ungodly difficult. While easy to beat in his "first form" After he pulls out a knife he becomes a cheap fucker, Repeatedly using barely damaging knife strikes that are too quick for you to dodge, and interrupts your combo. So there was a lot of satisfaction when I finally beat him and moved on to the third mission, Which was a driving segment.

This level has a lot to live up to, as the Paris chase in the movies has been called one of the best car chases in modern cinema, and its fair to say with how shitty the demo has been so far, I'm not really expecting so much. The chase lasted for about 30 seconds, and was godawful. including an irritating passenger with a tendency to talk all the fucking time.

Frankly, I couldn't of been more disappointed with this game if Jason Bourne himself came round to my house, Stamped on my toys, and kicked my dog. I was expected a lot from this game, and except from the pretty cool looking takedowns, it was one of the worst game's I have played in a long time.

Oh, and did i mention you look fuck all like Matt Damon?

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Article Posted: Monday 19 May 2008 at 05:29.
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  1. Anonymous Anonymous | 19 May 2008 at 16:23 |  

    YOU SPEAK THE TRUTH.
    I HATED THIS GAME SOOO MUCH!

  2. Blogger random dave | 20 May 2008 at 12:21 |  

    Sounds like a typical film franchise. But this is a book franchise (ie not based on the films at all, but Robert Ludlum's books), hence why 'you look fuck all like Matt Damon'. Nice review though, I will definitely be giving this a miss.