The Three Rs N3twork is a primarily British viral entertainment network, with standings in many niche interests involved in a variety of different groups. Ranging from gaming to adulthood to video creation.
1/10 - "Just, No." 2/10 - "Avoid." 3/10 - "Gamebreakingly flawed" 4/10 - "Not so great" 5/10 - "Pretty Average." 6/10 - "A few nice touches, nothing amazing" 7/10 - "Not brilliant, fun anyway" 8/10 - "A decent enough game, Well worth a look." 9/10 - "A really good game. Highly Recommended." 10/10 - "An absolute must buy, a defining game for the genre."
This review is going to contain spoilers. Character names wont be included, but either way, I want to discuss the ending of the game. You have been warned. Game of the decade? Defining game of the generation? A masterpiece? With all the hype and reviews buzzing around GTA 4's release, it was hard to find a source to trust, luckily the game mostly lives up to its hype.
That's not to say it isn't without flaws, there are more then a few instances of "pop up" in the game, and there are a few minor issues with the lock on targeting, and the cover system, and its irritating to fail a mission and have to complete a long boring driving sequence again and again because of a lack of in-mission saves, but, by and large, these are all minor concerns, and were the other aspects of the game any less then stellar, then these flaws would still barely show up.
The game has stripped out an armful of the less popular aspects from San Andreas, and plays like the previous peak of the series Vice City. It's a far more intelligent beast however, and the whole experience feels a lot more realistic than its forerunners, and the better for it. I mean, sure, I sorta miss flying harriers from the desert, or doing crazy stuff like using a jetpack to land on a speeding train, but its a worthy sacrifice for set pieces where you jump across rooftops escaping swat teams. The same can be said of the game world, It's certainly not as big as San Andreas', but as a trade off, the area we have got is far more varied, and incredibly detailed. this is a trend in GTA4, in every area you get less than SanAndreas, but everything you do get is of a far higher quality. Cars dent like they should, bullets leave holes in cars, windscreens, even people, and you cant escape the fact it just feels so real. And that's its main selling point, to me, is that it is in a living breathing city, everything just has an air of authenticity about it, from the people walking down the streets, to the occasional traffic wreck as you pull up to a junction. Everyone in liberty city is living a life, and for better or worse, you have the power to intervene in that, that's a major draw to me, and without a doubt one of the games biggest strengths. You can visit comedy clubs [with some excellent bits of stand up from Ricky Gervais], watch TV, go out to a fast food restaurant, all of the things you would do in real life. Unlike real life for most of us however, you're always free to cut loose and annihilate an entire street with an assault rifle. It IS real.
Its not just the city that is more realistic, the cars handle better too, the steering is heavier, and driving in general is slightly more difficult, but this is good, its more rewarding when you get used to it, and are evading the police with ease.
Past the gameplay, there's a storyline that can only be described as epic, taking you from Niko's arrival in the country, as a nameless goon, to "Niko Bellic" an ex-soldier forced into a life of crime, surrounded by bodies. Niko is by far a more likable character then those that came before, and there'sa lot more to his personality. This makes the ending even more bleak when it rolls around at the end of the 30-40 hours gameplay. "We won man, we won!" That's the last line of real dialogue in the game, and it didn't ring true, sure, you've finished the game, the bad guys are dead. But the ending proves that there isn't an exit for people like Nico. As a result of his actions, people he cares about have to suffer. It's a tragic ending that finishes an amazing storyline, and you genuinely feel for Nico when he realises revenge won't right the wrongs. At this moment, the journey is complete, and you realise the story of GTA is far more than its usual "Rise to the top" crime story.
I played through both of the endings on offer, and both are equally as tragic.
All in all, I'd give this game a 10/10 and if it doesn't win Game of the Year, I'll eat my own underpants.
This weekend DW and Darkshadowfang have gone off to a festival, so this will be the first of three articles I'll be posting this weekend to keep a constant supply of articles on the blog. This one was prompted by the disease that appears to be spreading throughout my social group, mentioned in previous posts. This disease in question has been spreading for some months now, and is called World of Warcraft.
I don't play WoW, I've never had the urge, and, to be honest, I'm not a great fan of MMORPGs, which explains why I'm ripping WoW in this blog. But what I am a fan of (at the moment, if I was writing this blog 6 months ago, it would have been to do with CoD) is GTA. But out of my group of friends, only DW owns and actually plays GTA, so I ask what are they all busy doing? Killing trolls and orcs on WoW. While what am I doing? Blowing shit up. Which sounds cooler to you?
Now, I'm not going to disparrage the poor sad acts who sit there playing it for 26 hours a day, because that's a mental condition, and you need professional help with that; me taking the fucking piss won't end those people's suffering. No, I'm confused at the people who play it 'socially'. 'Social' gaming. Using WoW to traverse long distances--in the name of society. Face it. Gaming is not social. I mean, let's take the example of Xbox Live. Go into a lobby on CoD and, if it's predominantly American, I get pummeled with 10,012 bad impressions of an English accent, that makes them sound like they have a crumpet stuck in their fucking throat. Is that social gaming? Just because it involves other people doesn't mean that it's social. Getting punched in the face isn't a social activity (I don't count boxing, they wear oven mits), even though it involves more than one person. If you want to further society, you don't escape into another society, in the hopes of finding something better. If you turn your back on society, it will turn its back on you. And to game, you must accept that. If you want to be social, go out, pick up the phone, even use some variety of IM. That's social.
Three problems with WoW are money, finance and funding. These don't happen all at the same time. WoW goes through your money first, then your finance as you remortage your house, and finally you're forced to dip into your business' funds. If you still have a business, and it hasn't become 'Property of BlizzCorp.' GTA doesn't charge me monthly. I know there'll be a lot of sighs at me bringing up money (because true gaming transcends monetary interests), but really? 18 quid for two months. Well, let's see, that's 9 GBP per month, and that's £108 a year, plus about 11 for the original game. So for a year's play of WoW, you pay the same amount as GTA plus two years Xbox Live. But... here's the bit I really don't understand... in WoW, you don't even get an M14. I'm lost... why are people playing this game again? So, you see, this is where I'm no longer blaming the addicts, because they get the most out of their £9 a month (in fact more, as they're playing two hours more than physically possible a day). But these 'social' WoW gamers, who honestly honestly honestly aren't addicted, are paying monthly just to keep the game running. At worst, you could be paying £9 a month just to play for a couple of days.
Also, the plot in GTA is fantastic. Not so much for WoW. GTA has drugs, sex and rock and roll. WoW has thugs, apex, blackrock and trolls. GTA has fast cars, and the mafia. The mafia! Where is the incentive to play WoW over GTA? In GTA you get paid, regularly, to blow shit up. But, most importantly, GTA has an innovation that I will love them forever for. Taxis.
Now, I know that Taxis weren't actually invented by Rockstar, but their use in GTA is completely innovative. Back when I used to play Oblivion (a fantastic game), when I first bought it I said to myself, I will not use the transport system. And why should I? The graphics were beautiful, and it ruined the realism of the game. I was never in a hurry to get anywhere anyway. But then, it just became impractical, so you know I compromised with myself, I'll just transport to the nearest city, and then walk it from there. Still get to experience the beautiful graphics, and it was realistic enough, but it was also practical. But, by the time I had clocked up my 2000th hour on the game, I decided that fuck it, life's too short for this walking shit. So I just beamed from place to place, and began to get impatient that I couldn't beam even closer to where I wanted to go. And even worse when I had to get somewhere new, I actually had to fucking walk there! What kinda game were they playing?! (An RPG, they answered.)
This was the problem, I desperately wanted to walk, maintain the realism of the game, but I couldn't be bothered! But Taxis answered this question! They were realistic (even had the annoying cab drivers who 'decided to take the long way'), but they also took you exactly where you wanted. And then, you had the opportunity to watch the entire journey (if you had the luxury of time), or skip it, for an extra fee of course. This extra fee translated to me into some kind of punishment for not watching the graphics. And, most importantly, they weren't available at the push of a button. In some cases, taxis were exceedingly rare at some points in the day, and this just added to the realism. Having to run five blocks to find any taxis, and then 20 running you down in the middle of the road at once. You even swear at them when they don't stop! Taxis are the best innovation of any game in recent years. More efficient than trains (they go exactly where you want), and just as realistic. But quicker than finding a car that's the right colour, BHP etc for your tastes.
This is the real reason why I don't understand why people play WoW. It doesn't have taxis. What were Blizzard thinking? The other thing is it doesn't have Nico Bellic. And let's face it, Nico is like a sarcastic Jack Bauer, a smooth Jason Bourne, or a modest god. Nico and Taxis. The best WoW got is the undead (yeah, they were cool in House of the Dead, but without the shotgun, what's the point?) Lastly, what WoW is missing, that would make me play it is IF99: the funk station on GTA. Nico, taxis and IF99. Any of those things would make me play it. Get all three, and hell, I won't just pay for the game and a year's subscription, I'll buy all the extras, expansions and shit. Even if I do have to remortgage Darkshadowfang's barn for it.
I hear a "Where's the GTA review, its been over a week DW, where is it!" from a few people, and to those people, i'm sorry. I tried to power through the story mode so i could hammer out a review, but I got distracted.
Distracted by what you say?
Let me tell you.
5: Cubed "The Game You've Played Before"
This is the Puzzle game on Arcade machines around Liberty City. I first gave this a go while going for the Achievement for getting the high score, and expected a poorly constructed cheap minigame not entirely dissimilar to those you could find in every 7-11 in San Andreas.
I was wrong. Its a well thought out game, and it continues to suck me in for hours. The fact its subtley nestled into a bigger game like GTA speaks volumes about the attention to detail here.
4: Street Racing
Now that the cars in Grand Theft Auto handle like you would expect them too, a particular favourite of mine is to tear up the streets in a high performance sports car, taking on all challengers.
A quick call to Brucie after finishing his mission tree rewards you with a Starting location for your next race. A particularly devious trick i developed for harder races, is to call the Fire brigade to your location before the start of the race, and it will knock all the cars off the road, and screw with the AI pathfinding for the crucial first seconds of the race. Yes, I've spent hours racing my Banshee up on down the Strip. 3: Hanging out with my Buddies.
Sometimes, I feel burnt out on missions, and if i'm in the area, i'll call up my buddies on the in game mobile, "Hey Little Jacob, Want to go play some Darts?" Nico will say, and these casual invites quickly progress into valuable downtime from the missions, where you can watch Ricky Gervais perform, Play pool, Darts, or even take your buddy bowling in the aim of strengthening your relationship with that character.
2: Watching TV
I find myself watching the TV for 5-10 minutes at a time whenever i'm back at my safehouse these days, I'm sure when I have seen all there is for it to offer, then i'll stop watching it, but for now, it sure makes me laugh. 1: Blowing shit up
Well, Lets be honest here fella's. It is a GTA game correct? From day one me and a buddy were holing up in the local cluckin bell with a shotgun and a handful of pistol bullets, and it has only got more and more "adventurous" as my firepower and experience with the top notch combat system has increased, I find myself regularly getting into shootouts with the police, and then tearing across town flinging grenades out of my car window, raining explosive fiery death at every junction.
Thats what i've been doing instead of reviewing the game, and i havent even touched on the Time Drain that is the multiplayer yet.
I woke up to see the familiar play.com parcel at the bottom of my stairs, and I pretty much skipped with excitement, Nothing else on order but GTA, so that meant it was time.
I took it out of the Bag
And then spent 10 minutes trying to open the cellophane. Inside theres a "liberty city guidebook" and a one month free Xbox live trial, the disk has niko's not so smiley face on it.
now, im not so bothered about that shit, so I put it in my 360, and close the tray. i've been waiting for this for about 2 months, and i feel like a fucking two year old in a sweet shop.
The screen goes black, and then the rockstar labels come up, followed by the title screen, and then a beautifully drawn loading screen, i mean, it looks really sharp even on my non HD TV. Then theres the intro, Nico's on the boat, theres a guy getting whipped in a cabin, you see alot about nico here, but the main note is how fucking likable he is, instantly. maybe it's the eastern european accent, maybe its the light stubble, who knows? i did warm to him by the time the intro had finished though.
The driving is pretty different to how im used to, the cars are responsive, but you just need to be a little careful untill you get the hang of it, a couple of missions later, i have a mobile phone, and i'm watching out for scumbag albanians while my cousin gambles the last of his money in an all or nothing bid to pay the loansharks.
Soon i was joined by a friend, we had nothing better to do, so we soon got hold of a firearm, and started a shootout in a clucking bell, The shooting is so much tigher then the earlier offering of San Andreas and Vice city, and the Hand to Hand has been improved alot too
3 hours later, we're still playing it, and I give the game a resounding thumbs up. Expect a review in a week or so, but i think i've only scratched the surface of Liberty.
IGN recently gave GTA4 a 10/10, that makes it the first 10/10 in this decade. The last game to receive the highly coveted 10 score was Soul calibur, back in 1999.
From the off, Hilary goldstein heaps praise on the game, ending the first paragraph of his review with "Every facet of Rockstar's new masterpiece is worthy of applause. Without question, Grand Theft Auto IV is the best game since Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time.". I think it's pretty clear to say he's a big fan.
He closes with an explaination for the perfect score: "A "10" is not a score we give out very often. In fact, the last time we gave a 10 to a console game was Soul Calibur in 1999. A 10 doesn't mean a game is perfect -- it means a game is pushing boundaries, expanding a genre, and doing many things to a level so far above and beyond its competitors that they overshadows any flaws. Certainly, GTA IV has some issues, the most noticeable being the occasional flaw in the cover system, but there are many more pieces of GTA IV that are better than anything I've seen from a game in the past decade. We don't give 10s often -- just to games that merit the score."
The Review is located here and the video review here and my copy arrives on Monday.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled program with an announcement. Everyones favourite lawyer, Jack Thompson has written another letter to take two. Well, He's written a letter to the chairman's mother in fact.
No i'm not kidding around here, he wrote a letter to the take two chairman's mother. In it, he compares Strauss Zelnick, the take two chairman, to a member of hitlers youth, tell's her that her son is peddling pornography and violence to children and then finally quotes scriptures at her. Then, in a stunning 180, Wishes her a sarcastic happy mothers day in his close.
Here is the full unedited letter:
Mrs. Zelnick Strauss Zelnick, Take-Two Chairman's Mother New York, New York Via e-mails to intermediaries
Re: Your Son, Strauss Zelnick
Dear Mrs. Zelnick:
Your son, as you may know (or maybe you don't know), is Chairman of Take-Two Interactive Software, Inc., whose most popular video games are the Grand Theft Auto murder simulator games banned in some countries but sold to children here.
Your son last week was reported to have said the following about Grand Theft Auto IV, due to be released Tuesday, April 29: "We've already received numerous [GTA IV] reviews, and to a one, they are perfect scores. My mom couldn't write better reviews..." Taking your son's thought, I would encourage you either to play this game or have an adroit video gamer play it for you. Some of the latter gamers are on death row, so try to find one out in the civilian population who hasn't killed someone yet.
What you will see in your son's game, if this iteration of GTA is anything like its predecessors, is incredible interactive violence aimed at police officers (whom you can shoot in the head and see the blood spray), innocent bystanders (whom you can run over with your car just for the heck of it), and of course the plentiful female prostitutes you can have sex with and then filet with a knife or stomp with your feet in order to get your money back. Experts note that the recent plethora of cop killings is caused in part by your darling son's entrepreneurial energy. There are three policemen dead in Alabama because of Grand Theft Auto. I was on 60 Minutes about it. I hope Strauss has provided you with a flat screen tv to see the grief of the bereaved families that fills the screen.
The pornography and violence that your son trafficks in is the kind of stuff that most mothers would be ashamed to see their son putting into the hands of other mothers' children, but, hey, your son Strauss has recently assured the world that he is "a Boy Scout, everybody knows that." I'd love to see the merit badges that Scout Troop handed out. Is there a Ted Bundy merit badge? If so, your loving son deserves one now. It should be red and green, for obvious reasons.
With Passover having just come and gone, it is appropriate to note the following from the Old Testament, Proverbs 22:6:
"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."
Mrs. Zelnick, did you train up your son, Strauss, to make millions of dollars by pushing Mature-rated video games to children? Any kid can go right to little Strauss' corporate web site and buy GTA IV with no age verification. Strauss is even marketing the new Grand Theft Auto IV on World Wrestling Entertainment tv shows seen by millions of kids. If you trained up Strauss to do this, then shame on you.
But maybe the explanation for your son's corporate sociopathy is to be found in Old Testament Proverb 29:15:
"The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame."
Maybe you, Mrs. Zelnick, were so taken by your handsome son that you spared the rod and spoiled the child. That would explain why he has brought you, by the way he presently acts, "to shame."
There's another mother you would do well to talk to. Mrs. Crump in Alabama had a son who was a police officer. He's now dead because a teenaged boy unwittingly trained himself to kill him on Grand Theft Auto: Vice City. She has a grief she carries every day that only a mother can know.There are other such mothers in the heartland of America whose inhabitants your son simply sees as commercial targets.
Your son, this very moment, is doing everything he possibly can to sell as many copies of GTA IV to teen boys in the United States, a country in which your son claims you raised him to be "a Boy Scout." More like the Hitler Youth, I would say. Happy Mother's day, Mrs. Zelnick, which this year is May 11, two weeks after your son unleashes porn and violence upon other mothers' boys. I'm sure you're very proud.
Sincerely, Jack Thompson
To be honest, i'm struggling to see what the point of this attack is, its 4 days till launch, and i'd bet most game stores already have the game in their storerooms and i feel its REALLY fucking underhanded to write to someones family to complain. Hell, lets all write to members of jack thompsons family about what a jerk he's being!!
This is the UK TV commercial for GTA4 on the 360, its reminding me that its only 7 days till my copy will be sitting in my lap, and i'm getting VERY excited.
I think i'm going to ask Nico to marry me.
anyway, the Commercial is alittle plainer then say, The san andreas TV spot, or even the Vice City TV spot, but GTA4 seems to be alot more stylised then those that have come before.
The rockstar social club is due to start preregistration today, it hasnt opened yet at 4pm BST but you everyone should preregister so they dont have to waste any time when they actually get GTA4.
The Rockstar Social club, for those of you in the dark, is a Stat tracking website which will feature all manner of leaderboards and statistics based on your experiences on rockstar games. GTA4 will launch the website, and personally as i'm a total statwhore, im pretty excited.
you can register for the playstation 3 or 360 editions of the game.
EDIT: almost 11pm BST now, and still no prereg access.
I just saw the new GTA 4 trailer today, as its release is just around the corner, i'm getting pretty excited.
this trailer doesnt really show much. but i have a history of getting over excited over the grand theft auto games, ever since i got a copy of grand theft auto 3 with my playstation 2, years back, i've set my preorder, and i cant wait to take a new spin around liberty city on the 29th of this month.
A leaked review agree's with me, scoring it a 10/10. ill let the leaked scans do the talking, Here
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Game of the decade? Defining game of the generation? A masterpiece?
